We all have things that we worry about right? Stuff that we overthink & makes us feel anxious. I personally would say I am not a massive worrier, however there have been times as a parent that I have worried, like a lot & I really get how it can be all consuming at times.
In particular I experienced this when my son was homeschooled at the end of 2017 & throughout 2018, suffering from social anxiety. I worried a lot. I worried he’d never go back into a school again, I worried about his mental state, I worried how he’d react in certain situations, I worried if we would ever have a “normal” family life again (though what is normal anyway??!!), I was just consumed at times with this worry. It impacted my behaviour no end. Here’s the thing though I was working with a great coach at the time & he would remind me what a complete waste of time it was.
We all have complete control over our thoughts & there are times when we need to get a grip on them, I needed to do this at this time. I knew worrying was not going to help us move forward. I also knew staying in this mindset was not going to help the family or my clients. It was working with my 121 clients at that time that helped me through this stage, it’s interesting how the work you do can have such a positive impact on your own wellbeing & mental state too. My 121 work was so incredibly positive, motivating & inspiring at this time in my life, it helped me to reset, let go of the worrying thoughts that were never going to serve me & helped me serve my clients instead.
Over the years that I have coached, one of the biggest problems that the majority of my clients have required coaching on is anxiety.
What I have observed is that anxiety can really pause progress in their business & have a huge impact on life itself causing them to hit overwhelm which triggers procrastination. (I could completely see this from observing my son’s behaviour too). Procrastination is the killer of action & can have a dramatic impact on efficiency & results over time. If we fall into this pattern it can be tricky to interrupt, & what’s worse is we often repeat these patterns over & over. So how do we get past this vicious circle? The first step to change is awareness, becoming really conscious of our thoughts, feelings & actions is key. It’s from this that we can then try to understand what’s present & then move to reconditioning (the hardest part & the part most people don’t do).
What actions are required to overcome this pattern of behaviour?
The clue is in the question. ACTION!! We need to take action, the best actions are those we are resisting, this is the exact action we need to do.
So what is it your are resisting in your business & life?
I’ll be honest it’s extremely hard to see this stuff yourself, (even after all the years of personal development I can’t always see my own stuff! And if I do, it’s not always easy to interrupt, we all need to be kept accountable!), which is why I’ve always believed in having a coach myself. Having someone keep you accountable & observe the patterns as an outsider looking in is priceless, helping us to realise that worrying is a waste of time & enabling us to avoid procrastination!
As a coach, my success with my clients has come from having Activation as one of my top strengths, (discovered from the Strengths Finder – which is amazing btw so highly recommend buying the book & doing the quiz), and this means I am on fire (ha!) & hugely fulfilled when I am taking action, moving forward & getting stuff done. I’m told I’m pretty good at motivating my clients 😉
This creates a great partnership (especially those who have a strength that means they like to consider things for a long time, often overthink or have high empathy).
Knowing your strengths can help you to see who you may need to partner with to maximise your own strengths & ensure you are moving forward in the right direction. I’ve worked with a couple of clients over the years who are very strong in Empathy (which btw is a wonderful strength to have – these people have huge hearts), but what’s interesting is that they can care so much about other people’s feeling that they put theirs right to the bottom which obstructs them from taking action. By partnering together I have been able to help them move forward much quicker, (not meaning they don’t care about the people, but helping them understand that their feelings & motivations are important too, & to achieve their goals they need to create a balanced view) enabling them to move closer to their goals & dreams.
Do you know your top talents? What key skills are you missing? Who would be a good partner for you?
I know myself that I often miss the detail (oh and finances is not my forte either) so make sure I have that support in place.
Who could help you to achieve your goals in a more focused & efficient way?
I’d love to help if I’m your missing strength! My passion is help people move forward & find the thing that really lights them up. I’m having fun working with a young guy at the moment who wants me to help him find a new career…we’ve explored his strengths & personality traits which has been really insightful & helped us to see clearly where he needs the support to drive him forward.
All that is missing on this page is your voice, so do let me know your experiences & if you’d like a complimentary discovery call where I will outline my three programmes; Kickstart, Stepchange and Transformation; then I’d love to hear from you.
Wishing you a super February,